Simple Chronic Halitosis...Free time yesterday, so I took my free WAR OF KINGS SAGA comic book from the dust-bin and read it. I can now say that I totally understand War of Kings, and I'm going to share that very special knowledge with you.
WITHOUT FURTHER ADO, THE PLOT BEATS...
The Kree genetically engineer the Inhumans.
According to the official Marvel wiki, the Kree injected Eternal DNA into Cro-Magnons. The Marvel Wiki also says that the Kree established a beach-head on Uranus. Wonder how that slipped past the editors?
The Inhumans throw off the Kree's leadership and now live in the city of Attilan, located on the Moon.
Marvel wiki says the Kree just left, which makes more sense than a handful of superhumans taking on an intergalactic empire. Anyway: they live on the Moon.
The Inhumans expose their young to the Terrigen Mists, which gives them super-powers.
Which means that Earth is home to four outshoots of the human race: Eternal, Deviant, Mutant and Inhuman. Maybe I'm missing a few races.
The Inhumans are a benevolent monarchy, under the benevolent leadership of benevolent monarch Black Bolt.
We meet the royal family. Lockjaw is back to being a dog.
The Illuminati make the Skrulls angry.
Besides being a benevolent monarch, Black Bolt is also a member of the Illuminati. The Illuminati visit the Skrull world and blow stuff up, which is how diplomacy is conducted in the Marvel Universe.
Vulcan wakes up.
Vulcan isn't Mr. Spock's brother, he's the third Summers brother. He's also a really powerful mutant.
Vulcan declares war on the Shi'ar Empire, another alien race.
He's mad because they killed his Mommy. Vulcan's tale is quite Oedipal.
Quicksilver steals the Terrigen Mists from the Inhumans.
He does this because he's crazy. Also, he used to be married to one of the Inhumans.
The U.S. government steals the Terrigen Mists from Quicksilver.
They do this because they're Weapons of Mass Destruction.
The Inhumans steal the Terrigen Mists from the U.S. government.
They do this because the Mists actually belong to them.
The U.S. government uncorks a can of whoop-ass on the Inhumans.
They send a bunch of genetically altered Marines on a suicide mission. They blow stuff up.
Black Bolt abdicates the title to his not so benevolent brother, the insane Maximus.
Replacing a benevolent monarch with a nut-case? Another sorry example of America's foreign policy, gone awry.
Black Bolt is kidnapped by the Skrulls.
Never piss off a Skrull.
The X-Men chase Vulcan.
Don't ask me why. The guy went off into space on a suicide mission, respect his decision.
The Shi'ar kick Vulcan's ass seven ways to Sunday.
One man vs. an intergalactic empire. Shocker.
Vulcan becomes emperor of the Shi'ar.
Don't ask me, ask Ed Brubaker.
Vulcan kills his Daddy.
See what I mean about the Oedipal part?
The X-Men get involved, somehow.
Yes, it's all very complicated. Anyway...I like Marvel Girl's costume. You can see her belly-button!
The Hulk returns to Earth to beat up the Skrull Black Bolt.
This is self-explanatory.
The Skrulls invade Earth and Attilan.
The Skrulls are criminally incompetent, but never mind.
The Inhumans ally with the Kree against the Skrulls.
Good for them!
Black Bolt returns!
Yay!
Nova makes an appearance!
Now maybe his book won't be cancelled.
The Guardians of the Galaxy make an appearance!
They're now led by a talking raccoon, so how much of a threat can they be?
The Kree and Inhumans and Shi'ar mix it up!
The War of Kings has begun....
More Skrulls!
Because somebody needs to get shot in the head.
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