The 80’s were a magical time in Northern New Jersey, a decade of hair bands, The Breakfast Club and people driving around in cars with purple lights. For me, of course, it was all about the comics, and the 80’s produced some great material: series like Swamp Thing, JLI, The Suicide Squad, Grimjack and Camelot 3000.
Camelot 3000 came out while I was in high school. I recall this series as being truly awesome, so when I saw the hardcover for sale at B&N ($34.99; cheap!) I bought it and would have done so even if my issues weren’t all read to pieces. The first sign that my childhood memories might be – well, tainted, came from the introduction by Mike W. Barr (the writer). He was pretty honest in his assessment of the series. Nonetheless, I forged on and read the book.
(sound of shattering glass)
Oh, boy. O.K., let me start by saying that Camelot 3000 is very much a product of it’s time, that being the early 80’s. There are references to current events – Star Wars, the wedding of Prince Charles and Lady Di, a gun-toting cowboy in the White House (the last sounds strangely familiar...). DC was still experimenting with what would become the Vertigo format; thus the better paper and a smidgen of adult material. The growed-up stuff is rather mild by today’s standards, amounting to PG language, a bit of tame sex and some lovely bare backs & bottoms.
The story is standard sci-fi/superhero/space Western fare. Aliens attack Earth in the year 3000. They hail from the tenth planet, and are led by Arthur’s half-sister Morgan le Fay. King Arthur awakens from his tomb, frees Merlin and reforms the Knights of the Round Table. His knights have all been reincarnated in different bodies. Sir Tristan is reborn as a woman; her lover, Isolde, is also a woman, which means Tristan spends most of the graphic novel sulking about not being a man. Lancelot and Guinevere continue their affair and are not even discreet about it. They are banished from Camelot, another member of the round table betrays Arthur, Merlin gets snatched by a nymph with serious overbite, the Holy Grail comes into play, the knights journey to the tenth planet and things end with a big bang. The end.
Camelot 3000 has flaws. Earth in the year 3000 resembles Earth of the late 20th century, except for flying machines and wondrous gadgets such as the Pro-Bar, which resembles a crowbar with an attached flashlight. The supporting cast is more interesting than the main character by a mile. While I usually complain about the plot not moving fast enough, Camelot 3000 moves too fast. Some interesting bits, like Arthur’s massacre of the infants and the interplay between the knights, are glossed over in favor of less interesting material. Faith in God is treated like a super power – I don’t understand how Lancelot, an adulterer, can use his faith to bring Guinevere back to life, or how Mordred can make the Holy Grail into a suit of armor.
There are some good parts, too. Merlin chews up the scenery and almost steals the show. The riddle of the Holy Grail is well-done, and precedes the very similar scene in the third Indiana Jones movie by a number of years. The test Arthur devises to discover the traitor in his midst is clever and he uses Excalibur in some awesome ways, most notably in the climax. The Knights of the Round Table come from all parts of the globe, and are a diverse lot. Back in the early 80’s diversity in superhero comics didn’t exist; come to think of it, that’s still true today.
But the best thing about Camelot 3000 is the art. Brian Bolland’s art elevates this series. Mike Barr is honest about the fact that he was learning on the job; he also admits that he took his source material a tad too seriously. Brian Bolland’s response was to send him a picture of Merlin holding up a rubber chicken, and the resulting “creative tension” (as Barr put it) between the two made Camelot 3000 a better book.
Brian Bolland can draw anything. As I reread Camelot 3000 I realized that most of my fond memories of this series revolve around the art. Bolland provides much-needed comic relief in the form of visual gags: the happy monkey; the man being skewered on Excalibur, bowler hat perfectly balanced on his head; the weirdness of Merlin’s lab. He also draws women very well; his illustrations of Queen Guinevere/Commander Acton made a big impression on my 14-year old self.
Bottom line: if you can get Camelot 3000 at your local library it is well-worth a read.
